


I Let You Win

by idrilhadhafang



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Canon Compliant, Conflicted Kylo Ren, Heavy Angst, M/M, Missing Scene, Protective Kylo Ren, Twisted and Fluffy Feelings, in a really fucked way
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:34:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25962913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang
Summary: There was a reason for Kylo’s odd reaction when he learned Poe Dameron escaped.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Kylo Ren
Kudos: 15
Collections: Gen Prompt Bingo Round 18





	I Let You Win

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: That Moment (incident / chapter / episode) in detail
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing. 
> 
> Author’s Notes: Call it me noticing an odd reaction on Kylo’s part: how calm he seems when he finds out that Poe’s escaped.

  
  
When Poe escaped, Kylo...well, he didn’t give FN-2187 the suggestion. FN-2187 already had an idea that he wanted to get out of the First Order, and he had a sense of compassion that was much like Poe’s, if more guarded in some ways (terribly guarded for a man of twenty-three). But Kylo Ren _allowed it_ to happen. Played the part of the obedient kath hound to Supreme Leader Snoke, acting like he knew enough — but not everything.   
  
It would have been easy to pass it off as pragmatism. It would have been easy to pass it off as letting Poe get back to the Resistance so Kylo could destroy it (even though, in his heart, he doubted he ever could. His mother was part of the Resistance, along with Poe. Two reasons to keep the Resistance alive). It would have been easy to say that Poe was unimportant, that now that he got the information about BB-8, he just didn’t need Poe anymore.   
  
But those were both lies. He knew that much.   
  
Kylo let Poe go because deep inside him, inside the prison that was called Kylo Ren, he knew that he couldn’t do any more of this.   
  
He was torn apart. He could feel it every day, a great divide in him that seemed to just be getting bigger and bigger. And Poe — he hadn’t wanted to hurt Poe, not really. He still wondered what Poe was even doing there considering that he deserved so much more than this.   
  
He could still _see_ Poe’s tear-stained, agonized face even as he forced Poe to face him. Drew our memory after memory. He could see it, hear that scream — he thought he’d gotten used to torture, as one got used to brutality in war —  
  
He hadn’t.   
  
So he was sitting there, head bowed. _Monster,_ he knew he was. Monster, he knew he was becoming.   
  
_Do not worry, Kylo Ren,_ Snoke rumbled in his head. _He will forgive you. And if not...well, why would you care?_  
  
“Even he has his limits.”  
  
 _I doubt that foolish man does. His compassion festers in him like rot._ A beat. _It may yet be another victory for the First Order. Teaching the All-Loving Hero how to be like us. How to hate..._  
  
“You can’t do this.”  
  
 _Why not? What greater weapon is there than to turn an enemy to your cause? To use their own knowledge against them?_  
  
Not for the first time, Kylo hated Snoke, even as the Supreme Leader left him alone with his own regrets, his own self-hatred.   
  
He almost hoped that FN-2187 would keep Poe out of Snoke’s hands. To keep him safe. FN-2187 had better know how fortunate he was to have Poe in his life. A man who did good without expecting thanks.   
  
Kylo knew that he himself could never be who Poe was.   
  
So when FN-2187 broke Poe out, Kylo let it happen. Didn’t alert anyone. Let the other stormtroopers turn a blind eye to what was going on. If he reached out and let others’ perceptions be clouded, well...what was another lie on top of others he’d told to the First Order throughout the years?  
  
Kylo didn’t care about the Resistance. Almost. (His mother was there, after all) But to keep Poe out of Snoke’s hands...he would do anything.   
  
If Hux sensed that there was anything off about Kylo’s behavior...he said nothing. Then again, Kylo knew Hux didn’t notice.   
  
Hux was never very bright.


End file.
